Walking on the Mommy Tightrope!

Balance! It's such a simple word, but in reality it's probably harder to obtain than my goal weight.  We struggle as mothers to take care our family and ourselves, fighting back the guilt along the way.  When I go out I always call home to make sure everyone is ok, when the husband is out fishing I think he might forget he has a family all together while in the fishing trance, "Heather who?...ohhh, big fish!".

I'm one of those control freak mothers that trusts very few people with my kids, so dropping them off at a gym daycare is out of the question. I'm sure they're dependable people, but if I haven't known someone for at least six months and done a background check on them (yes, there is a free website to do criminal checks and if your friends with me I've probably looked you up!) they're probably not watching my kids.  So, I've taken up running after the kids go to bed or getting up at the God forsaken time of 4:45am to get 30-45 minutes of alone time.  Just me, the beautiful stars, the birds, and the mace clenched in my right hand for the poor s.o.b who stops to ask me for directions...I may have read too many true crime books in college!

Back to fishing (my husband is now actually reading this and not just scanning it)...when the husband is fishing there is nothing better then watching a movie I actually want to see and there is no compromise involved.  I can pick out the most ridiculous chick flick, maybe put the kids to bed a few minutes (or an hour) earlier, and scoop up a big bowl of ice cream I'm going to regret in the morning...when I'm up at 4:45am running...from the potential serial killer...who needs directions.  Did I mention I was a criminal justice major in college?

What do you get when the likelihood of success in your second marriage is 30%?  Two people who understand the importance of keeping their marriage a priority!  When the husband and I need some alone time, we've come up with what we call "sneaky dates".  Yes, it sounds very seductive and romantic, but in reality it's a time for us to enjoy a warm meal & movie without the children. It's simple, but effective; we feed our kids peanut butter and jelly or noodles for dinner and when they're sleeping we order pizza or get take out, watch a movie, and pretend we're dating again.  When it seems like our children and life are taking over, this puts us back in balance.  Try it once and you'll be hooked!

Let's not forget about those mini vacations we moms call "going to the bathroom alone"!  I'll admit it, I lock the door and tune out the screaming of the kids and kick the matchbox cars back under the door when they hit my feet.  Sometimes I sit there just a little longer than necessary and ignore that voice saying, "it's too quiet out there, that can only be bad!.  I think of all the time I had alone before kids that I never appreciated, now I'm over the moon happy if I can have two minutes alone in the bathroom...no one tells you about that at baby class!

Everyone struggles to find that perfect balance, for me it's the mom/wife/woman tightrope I walk everyday!  We all fall off and beat ourselves up over it, when we should be proud we have the strength to get back up and try again:)